Author John Eldredge believes we’ve taken the big dreams out of a man’s heart when we tell him to be a good guy. This dedication to kindness is the reason there are so many tired and lonely women, so many fatherless children, and so few real men. Men can change this. Learn 3 things Eldredge says men should do to become Wild At Heart and reinvigorate their relationships.

1. Deep in his heart, every man longs for a battle to fight.

Aggression is part of man’s design; They are wired for it. Children long to know that they are powerful, dangerous, someone to be reckoned with.

Hockey and boxing were not female creations. A boy wants to attack something and so does a man. Even if it’s just a small white ball on a tee. He wants to hit him in the coming kingdom. Whether we like it or not, the child is a warrior who gets bored with games that have no element of danger or competition.

Life needs a man who is proud and proudly devoted. Eldredge reveals how to do it throughout his book.

2. Deep in his heart, every man longs for an adventure.

There’s a reason the American cowboy has taken on mythical proportions. He embodies a longing that every man knows from a young age: to go West, to find a place where he can be all that he was meant to be. That is wild, dangerous, unrestricted and free.

This is not a macho pep rally. It is a search for authentic masculinity. Adventure demands something of us, it puts us to the test. Although we may fear the test, at the same time we long to be tested, to discover that we have what it takes. If a man has lost this desire, he says that he does not want it, it is only because he believes that it will not pass the test. So he decides it’s better not to try. Eldredge reveals many ways to change that.

3. Deep in his heart, every man needs a beauty to rescue.

Once awakened to the beauty of love, the man wants to be the hero of his beauty. He wants to attack the castle, kill the giant, jump over the parapets, or maybe hit a home run. It’s not just that a man needs a battle to fight; he needs someone to fight for. A man years for romance.

What about the female heart?

Eldredge explains the three essential desires in a woman’s heart:

Every woman years to fight, to be persecuted and to be a priority for someone.

Every woman also wants an adventure to share. She doesn’t want to be the adventure; she wants to be caught up in something bigger than herself.

Every woman wants to have a beauty to reveal. It’s not just physical beauty. It is a deep desire to truly BE beauty and delight.

How can these ideas revitalize your relationships?

WILD AT HEART is not about things men can do to be better guys. It is a book about the recovery and liberation of a man’s heart, his passion and his true nature. It is an invitation and an instruction guide for a man to go to the high country of the soul, to wild and uncharted regions, and win back his heart.

Eldredge invites women to discover the secret of a man’s soul and revel in the strength and savagery that men were created to offer. Eldredge concludes that men, women, and children will be happier and healthier when men have a wild heart. She uses biblical references to support his recommendations, but his ideas transcend any religious boundaries.