How often do we hear people say that they never find anyone suitable to date? No matter how hard they try, they regularly check online dating sites, accept invitations from friends, join various groups, they never seem to find anyone they really get along with. Is there something else going on or are they really ready, available to date and just unlucky in their search?
If this is the case for you, what needs to happen for you to be available to date?
– Works it can place many demands and distractions on our being available to date. Being tired, worried, or overly engaged can mean that we have little free time or energy to make the effort to look attractive and be receptive to someone else’s charms. Preparing to meet someone new requires a certain amount of effort, time, and money, and it’s not always to spare if we’re immersed in business demands, deadlines, and family concerns.
We may not even be sure how free we will be to wholeheartedly pursue a new relationship in the coming weeks and months. Working long hours or regularly being away from home can curb our desire to date. We’re already so busy that even thinking about the first few days of a new relationship can seem like too much effort to bother with. However, building a business or a career is often done with an eye toward our future expectations, hoping to settle down with a partner, have a family, build a home together.
Taking care of finding a better balance in life often incorporates a mindset shift where we include all areas of life and make ourselves available to date.
-Friends They know us well and may insist that they really want to see us settled and loved in a great new relationship, but is that really the case? Are you sure that deep down you are okay with changing the existing dynamic of your friendship, where your time and loyalty may start to be influenced by the need to consider someone else?
You may notice a change in his behavior as he begins to need you more, or becomes negative or critical of any potential new suitor. Pay attention to what is happening and try to talk about how you both feel. Reassure them that they will always be important and determine to maintain regular contact, even if it sometimes has to be done by phone or online.
-Family it can be interesting, especially if you are very close to your siblings or parents. Siblings can be jealous at the prospect of their brother or sister dating, especially if they’ve shared a lot, maybe helped each other through tough times, survived a breakup, and spent many hours together sharing secrets and advice, communicating regularly . base.
– Daughters and mothers. Girls usually say that their mother is their best friend, they call each other every day, they talk about everything. But there is a saying, give your children roots to grow and wings to fly. Some mothers have a hard time letting go and rely too much on their daughters for company. They can be possessive, loathe to lose their intense closeness to a new third party.
If a mother refuses to let go, it can hijack the possibility of a new flourishing relationship for her daughter. Often in a position of influence, she can always be there with money, gifts, insider knowledge of what buttons to push. She can call regularly, constantly available to help and provide support at any time. How can a potential new relationship compete with such an intimate and long-established bond?
– Children and parents They are also often great companions, sharing hobbies and interests, perhaps spending hours together because of a common love of sports, cars, etc. Some can work together and be the best partners. A new girlfriend can be a huge intrusion on the amount of time you normally choose to spend together. As with mothers and daughters, it can be hard to break up if the parent is reluctant to step back and decides to come on strong with guilt, loyalty, or the ‘why bother with him or her’ card.
If you’ve started to realize how hard you’re struggling to be available to date, accept that the change has to come from you. You need to determine what is going on or what is going wrong. Any new relationship requires effort, commitment, and can sometimes feel like hard work.
If you finally want to settle down, maybe find a long time partner, maybe start a family, some things may have to change. Being more assertive and assertive with some of your existing relationships may well be a step you will have to take. You must be prepared to do whatever it takes to be mentally, physically, and emotionally ready to meet someone who can fulfill you and your relationship needs. Then you will be available to date!
